A Day in the Life of a Census Worker

Being a government employee isn't as exciting as it's cracked up to be.

Sure, I get to knock on people's doors and flash my ID, and yes, I can call people up and scare them with the ol' "I'm calling you on behalf of an agency of the Government of Canada" bit, but it still gets old after a while.

Plus there's that whole census thing. You see, my job revolves around getting lazy fellow-citizens to complete their forms. They were supposed to be mailed in on May 16th, and that is the law.

I don't get paid by the hour. It's by the form. It supposedly averages out to about eleven and a half bucks an hour, but that's only if you go door to door.

That's what I did yesterday. I sweat for a bunch of hours, and it came out to about $10 an hour. Not bad, you say.

Well, today I decided that since it is so insanely hot outside, I'd go through people over the phone. I made seven bucks today! Yay! I mean, sure, it took five minutes to do it, but that kinda bites. I'm starting to wish I had a desk job with some steady pay.

I'll head out into the heat tommorow to chase people down and grab their info. I'll make a little scratch, and I'll work on my tan.

Just a quick rundown of all the my zany run-ins while going door to door. (Since I am under an affirmation/oath of secrecy, I cannot share any specific information, nor can I reveal anyone's identites):

• the Filipino family with Tam-Tams in their kitchen
• the 17 year old guy living alone in a house (probably a drug dealer)
• the super paranoid Russian guy
• the house with the insane dog
• the house with the insane dog#2
• the house with the insane dog#3
• 6 guys doing co-ordinated dance moves on the driveway
• the sweaty half-naked guy who insisted that he couldn't fill out the forms because 'he had someone over'
• the house covered in gypsy moth caterpillars
  

Michael Jackson in Japan

MJ waves 'hi' to Moe

From Pulse24:

As Jackson descended on the orphanage, he first had to swim through dozens of shrieking adult fans packed in around the downtown building.

Jackson was eventually ushered into a gymnasium safely however, where he greeted more than 160 children between the ages of 3 and 18 who were also screaming constantly, as well as several nuns.

“I love you," Jackson told the screaming crowd, before asking his translator how to say the phrase in Japanese.He then sent the group into further hysterics by telling them “aishiteru.”

What's in a name?

My last name is 'W e i n r y b'. In Hebrew and Yiddish it is pronounced 'Vaynreb'. I punched it into Wikipedia, and here is what I found:

German word Weinrebe, Weinreben (Yiddish: vaynreb), Rebe means grape, especially the tree of grape.

This word has same meaning with Weinstock, Weinbaum.

Variations are Weinrub, Weinrib, etc.
Geffen, Gefen, Gopen, is Hebraised form of Wein- style surnames.

Wein, Vayn (Russian: Вайн, װײַן) means grape, vine, wine in German language and Yiddish language.

On onomastics in Judaism, there are many surnames: Weiner, Weinfeld, Weingart, Weingarten, Weingott, Weinheim, Weinheimer, Weininger, Weinkop, Weinlager, Weinlander, Weinlaub, Weinmann, W e i n r y b, Weinsberg, Weinshel, Weinschelbaum, Weinschenk, Weinschenk-Bender, Weinschenker, Weinshenker, etc..

According to Nelly Weiss, Wein- style family names are originated from signboards (house sign, house shield, cf.herald) like Jewish communities like Frankfurt/Main.

Got any cool info about your last name? Look it up and see what you get.

You can talk the talk, but can you...

Music Reviews

If you can't figure out who these two people are, you need to get your eyes checked.

Hey gang. I wrote some music reviews for The Varsity a while back, and I thought I would finally put them up here. Why now? Well summer is on its way in, and that means playing music really loudly and tumbling around in your flip-flops while throwing back a beer and howling at the moon.

OK, I do that all year round, but don't let that stop you. Here goes:

Neverending White Lights Act I: Goodbye Friends of the Heavenly Bodies
(Ocean Records/MapleNationwide)

For his dream project, producer Daniel Victor assembled a talented roster of male vocalists, including Nick Hexum of 311, Dallas Green of Alexisonfire, Daniel Greaves of The Watchmen, and Our Lady Peace's Raine Maida. The result is a moody masterpiece imbued with a whispered urgency. Every track, sung by a different guest artist, drips with sincerity-by extracting the artists from their bands, Victor garners surprising results. Green displays his versatility outside of his screamo gang Alexisonfire on the track 'The Grace," while Maida leaves his "We are all innocent" shtick from recent overblown OLP ballads behind, and instead lays down a powerful track about collective guilt ("Liar"). Highly recommended.


HiretsukanEnd States
(G7 Welcoming Committee Records)

The second EP from G7's Hiretsukan puzzles me. Its musical arrangements verge on a unified symphony of rock rage, but vocalists Michelle Proffit and Dave Sanders vomit all over it with nonsensical screeches. A karaoke version of this album would be a pleasure to listen to, but with the vocalists barreling through the half-hour disc with shouts of unbridled scratchiness, listeners will be left wondering what the hell they are trying to say. This is a decent album to listen to when you are in a very sour mood. The rage comes through, even if the lyrics don't. You can jump up and down in the invisible mosh pit on your bed, grimacing as these New York noisecore kids blast the eardrums out of your head. Once the record is over, you'll feel much better. If you are into the hardcore scene, you ought to check this disc out. If not, remember-you have been warned.

Attempted B & E at my house?

So about six minutes ago, my sister and I were putzing around the house, when we heard the sound of someone frantically trying to open our side door.

“What do we do”? Debra asked imploringly, staring up at me from her World Issues essay.

“I’ll go have a look,” I answered

I marched to the door and parted the dusty blinds with my index finger. A creepy pair of eyes stared back at me. He wore a red shirt and a grey cap.

In a thick Russian accent, he said something in English, but largely unintelligible. I asked him to repeat it.

“Michael McKevy. I am looking for Mishkev.”

At least, that’s what it sounded like. Anyways, after I informed him that he had the wrong place, he walked to his car, which was parked in the driveway, and he reluctantly drove off.

So here is my analysis: It sounds like a clear-cut case, doesn’t it? Some guy was told to go to a house, but he went to the wrong address. He was simply told to go to the sidedoor... WRONG!

That does not explain why rather than knocking (which anyone would do when arriving at someone’s home for the first time), this guy was desperately trying to crack the door open. He was shaking that knob for a bit before I answered, and when I confronted him, he looked genuinely surprised that someone was home.

Creepy.

So lock your doors, dear readers. You never know when some random guy is going to try to open it.

* Oh, hey there. Still reading? Wanna see something cool? The international trailer for Superman Returns just hit the net. See it here. Dig that last sequence!

A Toronto Story

Never heard of Scott Pilgrim? Me neither! Apparently a free issue of this comic was distributed a few weeks ago, and now the whole book (24 pages) is online.

Why do I mention this? Well, as I was reading it, I discovered that it is set in Toronto! This rarely happens in the funny-books, so it was a real treat. Want to see fictional characters walking around Queen Street? If your answer is yes, click here for the whole story, and scroll down.

A brief excerpt:

Another blogger talks Da Vinci

The Book Bitches blog is the address for opinionated literary criticism shrinkwrapped in estrogen and anger. Here is an excerpt from their take on the Da Vinci Code movie;

"I went into this movie with little expectations, having not found the book to be the orgasmic work of art everyone else on earth did (my theory on this is: most of these people had never read as much as a comic book and so were easily impressed by TDC) but seeing it was pleasurable enough..."
(Click here for the rest)

Personally, I have neither read the book or seen the movie. I do not have much interest in either. By taking the most reproduced (and thus most popular) image in the world, and placing it on the cover, and then filling the text with historical inaccuracies, elements of plagiarism, and sensationalistic potboiler twists, Dan Brown created a work of mindless entertainment.

As a man of letters, I see nothing wrong in using the printed page to diverse effect. I value a good cookbook nearly as much as my cherished Graham Greene novels. Books may be for entertainment and pleasure just as much as they can exist for education and involving experiences. The fact is, Brown's Da Vinci Code is a harmless mystery novel that has been blessed with an undue amount of press. Just like Tom Cruise and Brangelina, it is an overexposed creation that is filling space in newspapers and magazines.

If you like the book, good for you. Enjoy it, and have fun. Want to see the movie? Go right ahead. I hear it's a mediocre piece of cinema, but it might be a good popcorn flick - a redeeming quality if ever there was one.

Now if you will excuse me, I've got some Harry Potter books to dig through.

What's your opinion on the whole Da Vinci Code phenomenon? Leave it in the comment box!

Poems

Joey, Avi, and Eli pose at Ramat Rachel - Jan 06 (click to enlarge)

While rummaging through a bag today, I discovered a notebook. Inside were two poems I penned while travelling through Israel and Poland.

I don't claim to be a poet. In fact, I dropped out of a poetry class a few days ago because I found it to be more obtuse and inane than I thought possible.

The first poem was written while sitting on a bus that was zipping along an Israeli highway;

Take Me Away

The road is sane but hollow.

The heat is constant but despairs.

Slung guns and rock walls make the picture.

Big birds and little spiders make the scene.

My voice is buried in my body.

Mountains stare at me like large eyes.

The sun beats down on me,

and the sea beats the rocks.

Nature is abusive - a beauty.

The plane will take me away

Unless this place already has

To a time when I can sleep

To a room where I can dream

The second poem was written in the Warsaw airport after I recited Shacharit (morning prayers). My travelmates, Alan & Avi S. did the same. It was a form of provocation on our part. We wanted to stick it to the many anti-Semitic Poles that still populate the country. Here it is;

Go to Look

I wore my tefillin in the Warsaw airport today.

I recited the morning prayers.

People stared at me.

Some smiled knowingly. Some smiled confused.

Others were surprised. Others were scowling.

I don't care.

To represent my people, to touch a flicker of greatness.

When there are 300,000 bodies in a cemetery,

and no-one in their homes

You go to look.

With millions lost in smoke, ash, and ditches

You go to look.

You might find it in the Warsaw airport

A Warsaw Street - Avi W. photograph (click to enlarge)

He's back

The final poster for the film was just released (click to enlarge)

The long awaited Superman Returns will be flying into theatres this summer. It was directed by Bryan Singer (X-Men 1 and 2, The Usual Suspects) and stars Brandon Routh, Kevin Spacey, Kate Bosworth, and Parker Posey.

Watch the new trailer here.

Some photographs:

I finally found a job!

Avi is flying high (A Joey Lightstone photograph)

Hi kids. Remember when I was looking super-hard for a summer job, and I was so down on my luck that I even made a dismal mini-documentary about it?

That's a rhetorical question - you don't have to answer.

Anyhoo, I now have one job, with interviews for two other ones! What's my secret? I applied to a zillion million gajillion jobs! Big jobs, little jobs, and even odd jobs. No job was too big or too small. I was up for (almost) anything. Here's a quick chronicling of where I'm at:

The Job I Have

I am now under the employ of Her Royal Majesty's Dominion of Canada. Just like James Bond, I look good in a tux, and I work for the Queen. I am an enumerator for Statistics Canada. I passed a written test and a background check, and I have taken an oath/affirmation of secrecy. My (paid) training is to begin next week. I'll mainly be running around, encouraging people to complete the 2006 census.

How did you find the job?

I saw an ad in the back of the newspaper, and I applied.

The Upcoming Interviews I Have

Camp Robin Hood
I applied to Camp Robin Hood last night, and I got a call from the director today, asking if I would like to set a time for an interview. I'm curious to see how much they offer me. I could theoretically do this job after I complete my Statistics Canada job, as the two don't really conflict with each other, schedule-wise.

How did you find this job?

I saw an ad on the Canadian Job Bank database.

Jews for Judaism
I applied to Js for J last week, and I received a call today, asking for an interview. The job title? Program Resource Coordinator.

How did you find this job?

There was an ad in last week's Canadian Jewish News.

Lessons Learned:

Never give up! There are a ton of jobs out there, and the only way to nab one is to cast a wide net and see what you pull in.

Use all the resources available to you. That includes internet, newspapers, networking, and your crazy uncle Louie.

Mashed up and dropped out

Hi folks. I just heard a rather impressive mash-up of Dashboard Confessional mixed with Brand New. Want to hear it too? Get the mp3 here.

In other riveting news, I attended my first summer class lecture today. It was a mind-numbing three hours of poetic theory. Yes, you read that correctly. Three hours talking about how poems work. We examined iambic functions in contrast to the trochaic and dactylic, memorizing the eight different meter structures, along with the historical implications. I could not recegonize the pentameter with 100% accuracy, but I was still able to enjoy the poems themselves.

I blew $131 on books. I lucked out by grabbing Shakespeare's sonnets from a used book store for $5. The $76 Norton Anthology is a big ol' doorstopper.

After muddling through tonight's readings (103 pages of theory), I realized that there is no way in hell that I am taking this course. I hope to drop out of it tonight, get my tuition refunded, and then I'll take those stupid books back. I'll be stuck with the Shakespeare though.

I've come to the conclusion that I am a man of literature, not poetry. Some would argue that there is no difference between the two. (Well, those people are dead wrong.) Poetry is (sometimes) fun to read, and it is even more fun to write. I approach with glee the poems of Eurpides, Shakespeare, Chaucer, and Leonard Cohen. I just don't want to memorize the nature of their verse structure.

Who is Ezra Buzzington?

Hello dear readers. 715 of you stopped by last month. Thanks for making S of R one of your digital destinations.

For the many people that saw the hit indie film Ghost World (92% fresh at RottenTomatoes.com!), you probably remember 'Weird Al'. He was the oddly pleasant server at the 50s style diner that Enid and Rebecca frequented. Well, it turns out that he is played by actor Ezra Buzzington. He is a thespian of the greatest pedigree, having performed in countless productions of Shakespeare plays, as well as feature films and television.

I accidentally stumbled across his personal website, and I was delighted to see that there exists a film clip which collects his diverse performances. It starts with Ghost World, and concludes with the Jim Carrey comedy Me, Myself, and Irene. Watch it here.

It's a shame that we often embrace the huge stars of film, neglecting to focus on the smaller character actors that make movies so great. Keep up the excellent work, Mr. Buzzington. Some people appreciate you.

Shul Bulletin vol. 3

GI Joey received his beret in an elaborate ceremony. (A Snoopy Photo)

Welcome to another issue of the S of R Bulletin. It's lightning round time. Get your buzzer ready:

• Just about all exams have been written, and summer is finally truly beginning for us. There is a lot to look forward to, like job hunting, nagging parents, more job hunting, and getting sunburns.
• Moe tried calling from Japan to wish me a Happy Birthday (I'm 21), but I wasn't home. Sorry Moe-San!
• Snoopy is (reluctantly) returning home next month from his year of study in Israel. He will be heading over to NYC to lay down some tracks in the studio for the debut album from Green Citron. I volunteer my services for directing the music video. Snoopy sits on an Israeli boulder in the image below.

• Another round of Shul of Rock Radio has arrived. Crank your speakers and give it a listen.
• The Shul of Rock has been listed in the world's first comic book community search engine. Click here to see it. Fanboys around the world were rabid with excitement when Sophia met Kevin Smith and kindly offered me the autograph he gave her. Over the days that followed, nearly 3000 individuals came to S of R to read about it. Thanks to Smith's NewsAskew for originally linking it up.
• I am addicted to Neopolitan ice cream sandwiches. Mmm - so good.
• The amount of visitors, and returning visitors to Shul of Rock is skyrocketing! This is in part because of the wacky exclusive content on YouTube, but also because of word of mouth, random people stumbling in, generous links, and our healthy Google ranking. Thanks to Mr. T for taking part in the last vid. It was a jolly good time.

Watch how our digits have climbed! (click to enlarge):

• The President of Iran is an idiot. A dangerous idiot.
• This is what I would look like if I were on South Park:

Summer Mashes

Hi gang. Looking for an exciting summer mix that will keep you guessing? Head over to DJ BC's Summer Mash-Up page for some fun mp3 downloads.

As I write this, I'm listening to the track "Hey Ladies Night". It is a mix of The Beastie Boys (Hey Ladies), Kool and The Gang (Ladies Night), and Cyndi Lauper (Girls Just Wanna Have Fun). It's fun, but kind of silly. Perfect for your BBQ Dance Party.

From the Vault: Virginia

My great great great great grandfather Moses Jefferson Washington Weinryb poses with his sister, Ellie-May Weinryb. This was on display at the Civil War museum.

I'm starting up a new feature at the Shul of Rock. It's called "From the Vault". Every now and then it will pop up, displaying interesting elements from the past that I never got around to blogging for reasons I will likely never be able to explain. They are all of some interest, and it will mainly be comprised of cool photos, ancient text, and vintage vids. Want to see hilarious e-mails Moe sent me way back in 1999? How about the unseen footage of G.I. Joey singing 'Yerushalayim shel Zahav' from a hotel balcony? Perhaps you are itching to see nude photos of Gnome? Alright, one out of those three are not real. Which one, you may ask? Well, you'll have to keep coming back to find out.

Read the captions to these pics, and enjoy the past - in the present, which is really the future from when you finish reading this. Got it? Feh - Don't worry 'bout it.

Todays theme: Virginia!

More pics from Virginia can be found here, and here.


Even the highways are smiley in Virginia!


This is a shot of me enrolling in my courses for university. I had to do this on a vacation, in a Kinkos, really early in the morning. I didn't even get the class I wanted.


Avi calls Sophia from Virginia. "Will you accept a collect call from IT'S AVI. PICK UP"? Nah, I used a calling card.


Pillars at the U of V. Aha- I was testing you! This shot is from a previous post. I just wanted to see if you were paying attention.

Sabra Man, and other Israeli comic heroes

I always knew that there were some comics in Israel, but I always figured that they fell under the following categories;

1. Translations of American comics. I have some Hebrew Spider-Man, Superman, Batman, and Star Wars. They're all from the late 70s. I've seen some Mad Magazines too.

2. Printed collections of political cartoons.

3. Some modern comics from the emerging underground.

I never knew that Israel has a proud history of publishing comics books - in fact, most people don't know either. Even if you are not interested in comics, the video below is worth watching. It provides an interesting glimpse into an element of Israeli history that most people do not know about. Besides, where else can you see pictures of Sabra Man, a guy who gets his powers from drinking milk, or a Hebrew speaking Tarzan teaming up with Flash Gordon to fight space invaders and evil Arabs? Check it out!



Want to learn more? Click here.

Comedy at The Drake Sucks

I had just come out of a tense job interview and I needed to unwind. The gentlemen who had grilled me were friendly, but prone to maniacal laughter for reasons I never quite grasped. Live comedy looked like the perfect way to kick my feet up and celebrate Israel’s 58th birthday. As if a UJA sponsored dance party is any better?

Most of the people I know were heading to the party. When I got through to Benji, he leaped at the idea of seeing a live act. I had read in one of the weekly papers that there was going to be something called ‘Joke Club’ at the Drake Hotel, an uber trendy boutique hotel which also boasts a bar, restaurant, night club, and tons of artsy folks, as well as snobby pretentious artsy wannabes, plus the random celebrity and pseudo-celebrity (read Canadian celebrity).

After kickin’ it at Ben’s place we headed down. We were the first ones there, and the host, Nick Flanagan, was there to greet us. I hope he Googles himself and finds this post, thus enabling him to read about how unfunny he and the show were.

Rather than getting some half-decent comedy bits, Benji and I tightly gripped the arm rests of our lawn chairs while a succession of crap flowed before us. Rather than jokes, we got stream-of-consciousness babble. A lot of it was read from pieces of paper. “How Dadaistic!” some of the Drake denizens likely thought.

“What shit!” Ben and I agreed. Ben was prepared to leave, but he accepted my suggestion that we stick things out for a while to see if there was any improvement. There were eight ‘comedians’, after all.

We were three or four in, and I wanted to gouge my ears out, lobotomize myself, and then jump into a tub with a hairdryer. That’s when Katie Crown came along.


(Katie Crown)

She was the closest thing to a saving grace for Flanagan’s freak show. Crown is the former winner of the Tim Sims Encouragement Fund award, as featured on The Comedy Network. She is also a member of the comedy troupe “Knock Knock. Who’s There? Comedy!”. She was awesome. A beacon of light in the cold darkness of sub-mediocrity.

During the intermission we grabbed some drinks at the bar. Some comedy shorts were projected. They were quite hilarious. Things were looking up.

And then more crappy acts came on. Benji and I left early. It was nice to get outside.

The verdict? Well, for $5, you get what you pay for. Hell, my bottle of Heineken cost more. And as for the comedy? Three individual performers made crass/insulting Holocaust jokes. That was lame. But the show itself? Pure, unadulterated horseshit. Next time, I’m going to the dance party.

C is for Cookie

Forget 'V for Vendetta'. Why watch Natalie Portman and Hugo Weaving running around when you can enjoy the Bert and Ernie instead? The Sesame Street gang star in their own 'V for Vendetta' spoof. Watch it below.

Stephen Colbert has guts!

Man. Stephen Colbert has guts. At the White House Correspondents Dinner, he was able to stand at the podium and rip on George W. while the prez sat just a few feet away.

His comic monologue was really sharp and will likely be remembered for years to come. Want to see it? Click here.

Photos: Paradise Comic Con

Even clowns like comic books

Comic fandom gathered in Toronto this weekend for a three day festival that celebrated the literary visual medium and the culture surrounding it. I attended the show today with my sister Debra(, an ardent admirer of Supergirl).

It was a day of opportunity. I got to shoot questions to my fellow Canadian, Diana Schutz, a top editor at Dark Horse Comics (third biggest comic publisher in North America). She was kind enough to offer advice concerning the long road to becoming a comic book editor, my dream job.

I got to hear writers such as Greg Rucka (Wonder Woman) and Gail Simone (Superman) discuss their craft. There were the requisite scantily clad costumed women and the burly, middle-aged ponytail wearing dudes, but the majority of the population were males in their mid-20s to mid-30s, looking to score some shiny new autographs.

Industry legend George Perez (Crisis on Infinite Earths) was on hand, signing on behalf of ACTOR. After shaking George down for his signature, I snapped up ink from Rucka and Adrian Alphona (The Runaways).

It was a good day to learn, buy, read, and talk. Plus there were freebies.

The highlight of the day? Hearing Diana Schutz discuss the time she had to call up Frank Miller (Sin City) and inform him that a hand in some of his art was drawn a little too big. The lady has guts.


snikt snikt - "Whatcha looking at, Bub?"


The convention floor. Where's Waldo?


Debra poses with Hawkgirl. (PHOTO REMOVED because it embarrassed Debra too much.)


That's a lot of reading.


If you know who these characters are, let me know.


This man should be more happy. He's surrounded by comics!



1, 000, 000 square feet of comics


I didn't take any shots of industry people because I didn't want to annoy them. I bugged this sculptor instead.